Most days going to work causes a "sigh, if my cushy life seems this hard, how do people with lives that are actually hard do it?" Some days it causes 'seriously, I have to go to this f***ing job AGAIN?'-type anger. Today is one of the sad days, where I mostly just try not to cry in front of my co-workers. I miss my babies. I miss my BED. I cry when I'm tired. Ergo, I'm spending most of today hoping I can hold it together.
The good news is as much as can go well at work is.
My schedule for the next five months (which is as far as has been scheduled now) is great. All but one week I’m working on my favorite jobs. I’m assigned to every one I requested. I don’t travel except for that one week.
Also, I thought we got an extra week of vacation per year after five years. Turns out its four, so a few weeks before I went on maternity leave, my vacation accrual went up. I didn’t even notice until now!
Then, they gave me a new laptop. I’ve had it for a week now and I LOVE it. We’re encouraged to take our computers home if we want to. They gave me a few days before removing administrator privileges from my profile so I could install my home printer and scanner. Yay!
The “should I quit” discussion has been put on the back burner, so I’m happy being back at work has at least been better than I expected. I try to remind myself of this every day. Especially when I'm trying not to cry.